I'm scared of Jackie Warner

Yesterday, I admitted Johnny Depp makes me a bad lesbian. Well, so does my fear of Jackie Warner. I think some of it is just a natural aversion to exercise of any kind (unless lifting a drink counts). My roommate is obsessed with the show Work Out and oddly so is my mother. She called me during the second season to suggest I get my hair cut like that "nice lesbian on Bravo." Apparently, my hair isn't a "nice" dyke hair.



With the third season coming up, I decided to think about why I love and hate Work Out.

Why I Love Work Out:
1. Hot women. Sweaty hot women. 'Nuf said.
2. A show that finally shows a lesbian not as a straight male fantasy but as an athelitic, successful, powerful entrepenuer. Now that's progress.
3. The drama outside the gym is amazing. Jackie's relationship with trainer Rebecca Cardon was dyketastically dramatic.

Why I Hate Work Out:
1. Jackie Warner scares me. Yes, she's very attractive but watching her yell at clients and her employees intimidates me. I'm all for a powerful, aggressive woman but hearing her tell everyone to get off their fat butts feels like she's telling me to put down the cigarettes and the beer. And that's just not going to happen.
2. The show feels a lot like a guilt trip. I keep looking at my little paunch and feeling lazy. Maybe that's because I am.
3. The death of Doug Blasdell. It was so sad and devastating when Blasdell suddenly passed away. The show feels a little tragic to me now.

In the end, it's a tie. I'm going to watch this season and make sure I watch it with a light beer.

To read more about the upcoming season, check out AfterEllen.com.

Photo Source: Bravo